Miss Jeanne's Toes!

My feet have always been one of my best features. Really. My toes especially are long and slender and my nail beds are on the larger side which makes a pedicure look quite nice. There was a time, I think in Junior High, that my nickname was "bone toes". Although at the time I was probably mortified, I now take it as a complement.

As I age, my feet in general are looking a bit "weathered". The skin is becoming thicker on my heals and around the edges of my feet. Even the best pedicure in the world cannot cure the increasing size of the bunion on my right large toe. Also, the frequency of my pedicures is not nearly what it used to be. I guess if I have a bit of "extra time without kids" I head to the grocery store solo or try to clean up the house. All you Mamas can surely understand.

As some of you know, I participated in Team in Training last fall of '09 and struggled greatly with training and completing the half marathon in San Francisco. My left IT band (runs from the hip to the knee) was a mess. During the training and half marathon ALL of my focus was on that stabbing pain in my knee. Little did I know I had bigger problems. Immediately after the 13.1 miles I took off my shoes and noticed my middle little toe looking a bit swollen and the nail was BLACK! Yes friends, black. I will give you a minute to grab your vomit bags....

I spent the next few months making sure I had nice dark nail polish on hand. I had thought that time would heal this nasty toenail and maybe the nail would just grow out and things would be back to normal. Nope, that was hardly the case. What happened many months later will no doubt shock some of you...MY TOE NAIL FELL OFF! It is true. Even my husband who will go to many lengths to make me happy absolutely CRINGES at the thought of rubbing my feet. He doesn't verbally decline but his scrunched up face and look of sheer terror let me know that it is too much to even ask of him. Oh well.

Now it happens that the same week this toe nail fell off I woke up to an email from one of the Mamas. I'm not sure if she even knew yet of my "loss" but it evidently made an impact on her family. Her email is below:

Last night (kid) woke up at 2 am yelling, "Miss Jeanne's
Toes! Miss Jeanne's Toes!" (husband) and I were both like, WTF?
She was inconsolable, crying about how your toes were poking her. It took
me a minute to realize she meant "Mosquitoes" but didn't know the
word. Would you quit torturing my children with your toes at 2
am?

Doesn't that say it all? Even the kids are afraid of my toes...